Elaine Smith Writes

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Tag Archives: Networking

A rose by any other name*

…might not get the right plant food.

Today, I am very thankful for my friend Carole who has an uncanny ability (and, probably, some robust internet sources) to identify every plant I put in front of her—virtually speaking.

When we bought Casa Lagarto, we became the proud owners of a lot of flora and foliage.  Previously, I could recognize a pine tree, a cactus, a daffodil and a rose. Also, hyacinth and hydrangeas.  And not much else.

But here’s the value of networking—and a reminder that your network isn’t just your business acquaintances.

The first thing that happened is that my mom’s garden club held a meeting at my house.  After lunch by the water and their business meeting, they walked me around my yard and identified 90% of my botanical holdings.

There were a few things they didn’t recognize, and that’s where Carole came in.  She has unhesitatingly identified the Fringe Tree, the Mexican Hydrangea and the Spider Lily.  Also, the Canna Lily.

From pictures.

It’s an amazing talent!

And now everything in the garden is not only lovely, it has a name.

So, what’s in a name?

Sure, names don’t alter the essential nature of the thing being named.  On the other hand, if you’ve got a broken arm, you really don’t want your doctor calling it a brain tumor.  Trouble will ensue.

A plant without a name renders my essential botanical cluelessness even more deadly to said plant than it might otherwise be.  What generally saves them is my laissez faire attitude toward gardening.  Non-interference results in more weeds than are strictly necessary, but it supports the “First, do no harm” doctrine that is at the heart of my horticultural practice.

With a name, I can look things up.  I can research the best time of year for pruning, whether they need extra water (not too much of a problem in this year of the unending deluges), etc.  In addition, cause of death can be narrowed to something other than “I did something wrong.”  The carnation died from lack of water, the vinca died from too much water, but the begonia has survived because I recognized it needed water!

I don’t have a green thumb.  But I do have good and knowledgeable friends, and any plants that perish have only me to blame.

Thanks, Carole!

* Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, Act II, Sc. 2 (Flapdoodle!)

If I’d known then…

Networking 101

Yesterday, I talked about discovering that my network is more diverse than I think it is.  That reminded me, again, of the importance of networking and how so many of us don’t think we’re very good at it.

It has a kind of slimy connotation, doesn’t it?

Networking.

All those people handing out business cards and chatting with spurious energy the whole time their eyes are scanning the room for somebody better to approach, somebody with more “contacts.” <shudder>

I think we lose a lot of time and a lot of fun and a lot of valuable relationships because of that view of “networking.” My dread of the process began to disappear when somebody pointed me toward  Keith Ferrazzi‘s Never Eat Alone.  I wish they’d given it to me when I was in college (except it hadn’t been written then).

You can find some of Mr. Ferrazzi’s tips and suggestions on his website, but basically, he talks in the book about building your network before you need it and about how you should really be trying to find the ways you can help the people in your network.

Try going to your next event looking for a way to help the next person you meet.

Think about it.

It gets the focus off you, so you won’t be so nervous–if you’re given to those kind of nerves.  It guides your conversation–which, if you are a person who hates small talk–is invaluable.  It not only guides your small talk, it makes it bigger.  (Whew!) The connection will be more meaningful if you bring something to it.

Never Eat Alone is one of those life changing books.  If you’re a natural extrovert, maybe you don’t need it.  I, on the other hand, found it invaluable.

I’ve got a pretty good network in spite of congenital shyness.  But if I’d known then. . .my niece would really have been impressed!

 

Of course you do!

Who knew I had a network?

I did.

To a point.

I mean, I knew I had a network of theatre colleagues.  Twenty-some years involved in New York theatre, and I’d better.  If  I don’t, I have been seriously wasting my time.

What surprised me recently is the realization that I have a wider, more diverse network than that. And I’m very thankful to have made the discovery.

Last week, I took a trip to North Carolina with my mom.  We were going to meet my brother-in-law and my niece.  The purpose of the trip from our end was to hand over a car which is being passed on to my soon-to-be-licensed niece.  From theirs, it was to get the car and to look at several colleges.  “Soon-to-be-licensed” equates in this case, as in many, to “contemplating college applications.”

So, great!

We took a look at University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill–bustling, beautiful campus–and Duke University in Durham.  Not so bustling.  Equally beautiful.  (The students weren’t back at Duke, yet, while they were already arriving at UNC.)

All that is kind of beside the point.

When we got back to the hotel, my niece and I decided to go swimming.  (Also not really the point.)

Down in the pool, treading water and trying not to get our hair too wet–(Don’t ask me.  It was something about air conditioning and hair dryers)–we were discussing the colleges and what she thinks she might want to study.

She mentioned one possible career path, and I said, “You know, I know somebody who does that.  If you want, I could ask him to talk with you some time.”  She mentioned another possibility, and I said, “I think I was in a play with somebody once who is doing that now.  I bet she’d be glad to talk to you.”  A little bit later, she mentioned that she and her dad might stop to see Wake Forest on the way home.  I said, “I know somebody who went to Wake Forest–” and she said, “Of course you do!”

It was funny–although maybe you had to be there–but it was also an interesting lesson.

Most of us are well aware that networking is important.  A lot of us don’t think we’re very good at it.

But our networks are bigger than we think.

You know more people in more places and in more circumstances than you can possibly imagine.

Of course you do.

 

 

Time Travel

Kingsley Lake – Part 1

If you read yesterday’s post, you might think that today’s headline has to do with the ongoing investigation into why the emails don’t always get delivered to subscribers.

You’re wrong!

Today, I’m talking about a different sort of time travel.  Because, today, I am traveling backwards through time to visit a lake I used to go to as a child.

This is a dangerous thing to do.  Often, such a journey is destined to disappoint.  Things are rarely as good–or as bad–as you remember them.  They are, certainly, never as big!  I remember how astonished I was at the smallness of the  New Orleans school I had attended for kindergarten when I saw it again in my twenties.

Kingsley Lake, however, is unlikely to disappoint.  For one thing, it can’t be much smaller.  Wikipedia lists it as 2,000 acres.  That’s pretty big by any standards.  The lake’s own website says it is 2 miles in diameter and a very stable lake, so it will not have shrunk as I have grown.

Then, too, I don’t know that I remember it all too clearly.  We used to go to Goldhead Lake, as well, so it is entirely possible that I have the two lakes mixed in my mind.  I’m fully prepared not to recognize anything.

I am interested to see it, though.

It’s almost perfectly round which seems unusual to me in a naturally occurring body of water.  Apparently, pilots call it Silver Dollar Lake because of the roundness.  Nobody knows, but it may have been formed by an ancient sinkhole.

What does surprise me is the discovery that there is no longer any public access to the lake.  I’m absolutely sure I remember being able to drive right to it.  Apparently, however, when the surrounding land was sold for housing, nobody realized or thought it important enough to do anything about the fact that the public access disappeared.

The only way you can get to Kingsley Lake now is a) know one of the homeowners or b) be a member of the military (Camp Blanding, the primary base for the Florida National Guard sits on the east and south sides of the lake).

Fortunately, I got connections!

My cousin-in-law is a retired Master Chief.  He and his wife go RV camping there, and he is going to put us on the list so that the guards will let us onto the base.

I’ll let you know how it goes and what the lake is like now.

In the meantime, I suppose the take-away from this post in terms of career is connections are important–and you never know who can get you where you want to go.

 


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